My Condolences

It's been a sad few days. It seems that it's a funerary year - one in which I am destined to attend many funerals.

So far this year I've said good-bye to my grandmother and aunt. This past weekend my aunt's husband passed as well - an expected loss, but hard on the family nevertheless.

I opted out of traveling 3 states away to attend his funeral for a myriad of reasons, but I got another dose today anyhow.

A bad, bad dose.

I found out yesterday that a co-worker's husband died in a hiking accident late last week. He was 31.

THIRTY-ONE.

He was a very talented, vibrant person, as is his wife. She and I were pregnant at the same time last year - she with her first and me with my second child. I helped throw a baby shower for her. The girls are 2 months apart.

It just makes me ill to think about it. To think about a little girl just the age of my Little Miss having to grow up without her daddy. Of her mom suddenly being a single working mother whose best friend is gone just like that.

It breaks my heart.

I went to the memorial service today along with a number of other co-workers. It was nice to see the hefty turnout - the line was about half a block long to sign the book at the door when we got there, and the service was standing room only. Even though I was crammed with about 25 other attendees in a hot entry way craning to hear the service through an open door, I'm glad I went. The service was well done, and my co-worker did one of the bravest things I've ever seen. She got up and read a letter to her husband. It was superbly written - poignant, funny, and real. Perfect. And she read it flawlessly - didn't break down once. I am proud of her, and in awe of her.

I am sleeping with both of my kids and my darling husband tonight. And holding on to all of them tightly while I can.